Monday, August 8, 2011

The culprits

May I just say how excited I was to find these "beach" towels at HEB (my grocery store) this summer?  Just the kind of summer towels that I love:  super thin (fast drying), long (for lounging) and exxxxtra cheap ($2.00!!)
You get what you pay for, my dears.  That old adage never changes and always proves true. SIGH.
These things bled all over EVERYTHING.


All my sheets and towels and bras and socks and everything.  (No good clothes, thank the lords.  As if I have any "good" clothes.) Even worse than the ubiquitous uniform pink, they just spat bits of ugly pink bile here and there.  So there are big patches of crap and small patches of crap and streaks of crap and splatters of crap.

Now, herein lies the rub:  what to do?  I really, really do not like faded pink stains all over my stuff.  But honestly, what harm is there in it?  There are no linen police here, right? No one who comes to my house and uses my towels is going to judge me for my pink and aqua (!!!!) towels, right? No one gives a poop if Jackdaddy has a pink sock or two.  I can assure you that neither FinnigantheCurious nor Jackdaddy  cares one whit if the sheets are pinkish.  
But I do. I just do, dammit.  
However, being a thrifty girl and all and trying really hard to stay true to my simplicity beliefs, I just cannot go out and buy all new stuff.  Just can't do it.  
So... I went to good old Savers and looked for new stuff.  

No towels, BUT, BUT, BUT holy $*&%!!! they had lots and lots of Frette sheets.  Cast-offs from some high-end hotel, apparently. 
OH MAH GAWD do you have ANY idea how much I love really expensive sheets?  I do really, really love them.  They only had top sheets, but what the hell?  I just bought them all up and can tuck the flat sheets in tightly to make a bottom sheet like the hotels do. They do this to avoid having to fold all those nightmarish fitted sheets that never lie flat no matter what you do. (My mama used to say the way to fold a fitted sheet was to "take a wad and twist it." Basically, this meant to just wad them all up and shove them in the back of the closet. Hahahah.)  Fitted sheets, after being folded, take up twice as much room as a flat sheet.  Hotels won't put up with that crap and now I don't either. Hoo haw!  I got all the Kings they had and then got all the Queens and the doubles too.  I had a plan to give some away and then sell the rest on Ebay or Craigslist, but then I realized the chances of me sitting down and folding a bunch of sheets, taking millions of pictures, listing them, answering questions, arranging pick-up, packing them up for mailing, etc., etc...that was never gonna happen so I put them all back.  Except my Kings of course.   So there are some for you if you wanna run on over there.
Oh lawdy they are so fantastic...white, crisp, expensive. Mmmmm.

And there you have it!  If those damn towels hadn't bled all over everything, I would not have my delicious new Frette lovelies.  La, la, la.

Riveting story, right?

What can I say, it's all I got.

Happy Monday!

4 comments:

  1. Oh hey listen .. my people had pink underwear from time to time. What I did was think how bleedie the colors were once so why not wash the whites again and I did and they bled out the pink and were white again. The towels may be finished bleeding so wash them again by them on selves and maybe they will be bled out. Grusome, ain't it?
    ms mdd .. p.s. I wad my sheets too, tell your mamma.

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  2. "Evil Summer 2011." Ba ha ha ha!!!! Oh the hilarity! xoxo

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  3. My friend's husband used to say "A bargain is a bargain but cheap is cheap". Ain't it ever so?
    If baseball players can hit with pink bats and wear pink arm bands to promote breast cancer awareness then who's to scoff at pink undies and socks? So totally politically incorrect, my dear.
    And to find those sheets were meant to be by the Great Hoo-Hoo.

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