Sunday, December 6, 2009

Apron Love.

Who knew? I mean, really. Me? Me of all people. The one who was never going to marry; the one who was never going to have a baby; the one who was never going to settle down in one place. Oh, how I love my husband, my child, my home, my aprons. Yea, my aprons. I never knew they were functional! I really didn't. I guess I didn't really know what they were for. A uniform for the housewife? Protection for the grill master? A professional look for the pro? I feel like a dumb-dumb, but I guess I just never really thought about it. Then I became a mama and a housewife and I was having fun with the whole persona and I bought an apron at a church's yard sale and that was the beginning of the end. Oh, actually, I bought 2 of them. I know, I know! I bought them for a play I was doing, then they came home with me and the love affair began. The pockets! Oh, how I love the pockets. And to be able to just wipe gunk on my apron...such decadence. I used to walk around the house with a rag tucked in my clothes for such things, but now I just wipe on my apron and wash it at the end of the day. (Pardon me, that's "warsh" to those of you from the south.) Now I have a little, um, oh, collection of them. Is that too strong a word? An assortment of them, perhaps? Medley? Hoard? Heap? I have some and I want more. My dear friend, Jessie, just gave me 2 utterly delicious ones: a very 60s version with teensy, mod flowers on it (see photo)and a Christmas one that is kind of organzaish (also in photo) ...OMG, sooooo divine! Apparently, they can be had for a few bucks at the Citywide Garage Sale. Some German dudes selling them by the millions. Who knew that? German dudes and aprons. Ain't the world great, y'all?
So, I'm gonna have to draw the line at sensible pumps and nice dresses for cleaning my home, and there will definitely be no "children fed and in bed with a cocktail waiting" when "the man of the house" comes home. Well, I don't mind making a cocktail, for sure, but you know what I'm sayin'. You bring the tuna casserole and I'll let you borrow one of my aprons while you're here. German dude optional.

PS Damn, I forgot to clean my floor before I took this picture. My housewife look is just a look...obviously.


  1. Don't forget the Council favorite, "myriad." You have a myriad of aprons! HaHa! And that floor looks pretty damn clean to me, missy!

  2. That is just the finest look ever. I love aprons on other people but for some crazy reason all the aprons I have ever had are too long. I mean the pockets are down to my knees and the strap around the neck is bosom high. Any suggestions? I have tried folding it before putting it on but that does not solve the neck strap problem.

  3. ..and I say "Warsh" and I had aprons a long time ago. I remember a red bandana one I loved.

  4. How about 'plethora of aprons'?
    Aprons are great. I have a couple made from kitchen towels...double duty....I also got at a church garage sale. You always have something to dry your hands on, when you're rinsing and chopping and washing up.
    They are lovely with pearls.

  5. After having to use spot remover booster stuff on the bottom third of every blouse I wore for two days before, the day of and the day after Thanksgiving, suddenly I get what aprons are all about.

    Your aprons are adorable, whatever you call them.


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